I Relate To Melissa From “How To Die Alone” Way Too Much Not To Have A Season 2 — Here’s My Farewell Letter, I Guess…
This is basically my love letter to the show.
It’s been six months since How to Die Alone premiered on Hulu, and I still haven’t gotten over how brilliant the series is. In true Melissa form, I’m a little late pronouncing my love for the show, but better late than never, right (Alex, I’m not talking about you)? So here are all the times I laughed out loud, cried, or simply retweeted lines (in my head) watching How to Die Alone.
1. Blasting “Good Day” by Nappy Roots in the opener was a hilarious choice!
2. Risking your job to meet Lizzo!
3. Lizzo-Rihanna! Lasagna.
4. Single life can be… ghetto!!
5. “There are three kinds of deaths.”
6. “Every day I take people to where they want to go, but I have no f*cking idea where I’m going. And even if I did, I couldn’t afford it! I’m still paying off the Lane Bryant bra they cut off my body to drag my fat ass back into a world where nobody sees me.”
7. “Lift, thrust, weight, and drag.”
8. Hospital bills… ugh!
9. “I may be Black and round, but I am not a Magic 8 Ball.”
Hahsisgeugocdiahiedjsldi!!! Wh0oo00ooo wrote this line? 
I can’t!!!!
10. I’m sorry, is it just me, or is Rory the worst friend ever?
11. “You have such a pretty face. There has to be someone who can help you move on from Mr. Merman.”
Excuse me? Julie, is it? Girl bye. Telling a big girl she has a pretty face is a backhanded compliment. It’s bad enough that we already hate her because she’s engaged to the man our protagonist loves, and then she went and made this statement. Girl, have several seats!
